Homecoming-Tips for the Guys

I remember my first Homecoming dance in 1990.  It was a complete blast.  I had never been to a formal dance before.  Grade school dances were just plain stupid.  High school was a completely different story. 

For freshman year homecoming I went with a bunch of friends and, honestly, that was easy.  It was my sophomore year when it got complicated because, for the first time, I went with a date. 

Some of you are probably going with a date and, if you are an underclassman, that may be a pretty new thing for you.  So, in light of that, I wanted to throw a few ideas out to the guys in particular.

Ok, so first, accept that it will feel a bit (or a lot) awkward.  You may like the girl you’re taking, or you may not be sure.  Or she may like you, or you’re not sure, or she’s not sure.  Ugh!  Regardless, you’ve got a chance to practice being a gentleman.  That’s not an insignificant thing.  That is a GREAT thing.  There are a lot of men out there who are selfish jerks, and, unfortunately, they give the rest of us a bad name.  So, give men a good name and have fun treating a girl like gold.

Let’s start with practicals:  Look and smell nice.  How?  Here’s a few things: wear deodorant, brush your teeth reeeeally well, floss (seriously-bad breath is commonly from unflossed teeth), cut your nails, shave (even if you don’t have much to shave yet!), get a haircut, and my favorite: carry around Altoids.  You know those “curiously strong mints” that you can buy at Target.  Keep a few in your pocket.  Pop one just before you walk into her house.  Pop one after you are done with dinner.  Pop one before a slow dance. 

Oh, yeah, and if you can get a hold of some cologne, spray a little bit on your hands and put it on your neck. 

These details may seem so annoying since guys don’t usually think a whole lot about appearance etc., but girls are impressed when a guy does these things because they say to her: I am thinking about you. 

Ok, so, what the heck do you talk about?  Ask her lots of stuff.  In fact, think beforehand about what

to ask her about.  Want to treat a girl well?  Talk to her and learn about her.  I know we’re different, guys.  She just has to flick her hair and wear a cute dress and we have melted.  But her?  She wants a guy to be interested in her: her thoughts, her life, her interests, her feelings.  Now it’s just a dance.  It doesn’t need to be deep, but there are a million things you probably don’t know about your date that would be great fodder for conversation.

Now what if you have a date, but you go to dinner with friends.  Don’t ignore her.  Don’t just talk to your guy friends at dinner.  Still ask her questions.  Don’t interrogate her, but again, show that you’re thinking about her.

Now, the dance.  If you’re a typical American male, you haven’t done a whole lot of ‘fast’ dancing in your life.  The same was true of me when I was a freshman.  This isn’t sage wisdom here, but: try it.  You’ll feel like a dork, but just start moving your feet and don’t leave your hands completely at your side.  The easiest thing is to try to mimic the people around you. 

Slow dancing is much easier because you just have to rock.  The awkward thing is: how much space between you?  It depends on the nature of your relationship with your date.  If you’re not dating, don’t get too cozy.  On the other hand, don’t leave an entire ruler’s length between you.  It looks and feels weird.  It may feel strange to talk about this, but accept that a little bodily contact is not a big deal. 

Let’s be honest.  You’re touching a girl; it’s not something you do every day, unless you’re dating.  Needless to say, it will probably turn you on.  You’re not a pervert for feeling that.  You’re a man.  Still, it can make dancing feel a bit ‘intense.’  A way to chill yourself out a bit is to talk to your date.  Find something to laugh about.  Make fun of the couple across the floor that is dancing funny.  Whatever.  Either way you’ll get your mind somewhere else and, plus, it will be fun for you and your date.

What about your hands?  Again, depends on your relationship to your date.  Are you just friends, or interested, but still getting to know each other?  Hands on her back are the safest place.  It’s sweet, but not suggestive.  If you’ve been dating for a while, it may be okay to put your hands on her waist.  It’s obviously more intimate so, just be aware of what you’re doing. 

Should you kiss her at the end of the night?  Again, depends.  Here’s just my opinion: if you’re not dating, don’t.  Maybe you want her to know that you really do like her.  You don’t need to kiss her to let her know that.  Here’s a much easier, and, honestly a meaningful way, to let her know.  Say this, “Hey, I had a really good time tonight.  Thanks for going with me.”  She will melt like a slushy in the sunshine if you say that.  Then give her a hug.  And if you’re really brave, say, “Let’s hang out again sometime.”  Cue the fireworks.

Ok, I know my readers aren’t big on posting comments, but, if you’re a girl, it would be awesome to get any other recommendations here for our guy readers.  Thanks!