Myth #4: how I look affects how I feel about myself

This is one of those, “not entirely a myth” myths.  People do say “it doesn’t matter what you look like.”  Yes and no.  As mentioned in previous posts, it does matter… in certain areas of life.  One particular area is in romantic relationships.  It does matter.  Guys are wired that way.  However, life is not only about romantic relationships.  Therefore, our self-esteem need not be based on one area of life. 

It is good to feel good about the way you look.  My wife feels better about herself when she is eating well and exercising.  It feels good to her to look fit and attractive to me.  Yet, she would be the first to admit that there are parts of her body that she wishes were different. 

 
But here’s the difference: my wife’s ‘center’ is not how she looks.  Her ‘center’ is also not based on if others find her attractive.  Her ‘center’ is: God intimately, personally, passionately loves me.  No one will ever have the perfect image, or anything for that matter.  As Psalm 62 says, let your soul find rest in God alone.  He is your rock and your fortress and you will never be shaken.  Once you have that peace, you can enter into making yourself look good (in a way that fits you) without worrying about it defining your self-worth.